Why Don’t We Listen To Our Parents?

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Why Don’t We Listen To Our Parents?

The great debate of Professional vs Parent

I usually have a morning call with my mum, at least when she’s not off shopping for fresh fruit and vegetables at the market or on the beach starting a yoga session. I sneak in a quick 15-minute chit chat to wish her well and discuss what the day has in store for us both.


Today’s call, however, had a slightly different tone.


For a spot of context, I’ve been dealing with some health issues, low energy, cloudy mind in the morning and no amount of supplements, coffee, matcha tea or yoga seems to be helping. So I decided to see a Nutritionist. It’s a conversation I’ve wanted to have for a while, for the betterment of my own health, and in this case, the excuse to have a consultation with one was not an opportunity I was going to pass up.


I didn’t go into the conversation with any expectation, I understand nutrition isn’t a fix that shows results instantaneously rather its a long term process, one which compounds over years. But the advice I was given, I kid you not, was the exact same as my mothers.


“You’re low in this…”


“Make sure to add some variety to the meals in your diet...”


Back to the call

As I was discussing with my mum the recommendations the Nutritionist had given I could hear a shift in her tone, something had aggravated her and heat was building within. To her, 22 years of me not listening to her recommendations had finally decided to boil over. To me, it was plain, old confusion, granted the appointment was expensive but I didn’t think it warranted this sort of response. Thankfully before I unconsciously retaliated like an animal backed into a corner, the phone call dropped.


Phew, disaster averted.


While this may seem like a petty conversation about not being listened to and excessive financial costs on the surface, this narrative of parents not having the accurate knowledge to make recommendations on the actions their children should take is flawed.


I for one am navigating this confusing belief that going to a professional, i.e someone with qualification, to seek advice is a great idea. On paper, they are the better option, verified individuals, with the qualifications to back of the knowledge they possess.


But when professional give you the same advice as to your parents, whether it be a shrink, a high- performance coach or a nutritionist, and it’s verbatim there is something to be said about the compounded knowledge a parent/guardian has about their children just without the piece of paper to their name!


There is an element of safeguarding future spending, in that, if I get this consultation now I potentially can prevent excessive spending on all sorts of supplements and vitamins that are potentially counterproductive. While if I listen to my parents I have to deal with, what I perceive to be the potentially broken record of their advice.


It could stem deeper, the fact that I wanted to seek out the knowledge to understand myself better, brought frustration to my mum because instead of starting my quest for knowledge with her I decided to listen to someone else. In essence, completely ignoring her highly-personalised advice, which is what I was seeking.


Parent’s vs Professionals, or should it be parents alongside professionals. Not pitting their qualifications against each other but using both to our advantage. Taking the perspective of using a qualified individual to confirm or negate the free knowledge that our parents pass onto us which we can use to build a better understanding of ourself.


P.s Mum if you’re reading this don’t worry I’ll make sure to add some variety into my meals.